The Nice Guy Finishes Last

It is a saying that goes back who knows how long! 

The nice guy finishes last. 

Why is that? I happen to be that nice guy/gal. It's something that I do not understand. 

I am that person that will constantly think of the well being of others. Wanting and making sure that everyone is happy and no one is having a bad day.

What do I get in return.... 

Nothing...

Of course I have select friends that treat me awesomely and are like family to me, but why can't I only care about them? 

Why do I have to care about the people that don't care about me? 

My mind works in a way that I want people to be happy, I want people to know that I am there for them no matter what. 

Here is an example.. 

You left your phone out while we are working together and someone steals it. Somewhere in my mind I will figure out a way to make it my fault, and then I will try to figure out a way to find that person a new phone or buy one myself. 

DOES THAT MAKE ANY FUCKING SENSE TO ANYONE?!!!!!

A normal person would be like HA! that's what you get for leaving your phone out, but no I have to some how make it my fault. 

Some people think that this problem I have you can just tell your brain to shut it off and not feel like that anymore. 

YOU DON'T THINK THAT I HAVE FUCKING TRIED THAT?!!!

I carry this empathy around with me where I constantly worry about the other person, even if I hardly know that person. If I feel that way about people that I do not know can you imagine how I feel about the people I care about! 

It's hard to say it, 

I don't want to care anymore.

It takes up so much time and leaves me with so much heartache, makes me feel like its all a waste of time and a waste of space. I could worry about other things like MYSELF once in a while. But, as I am typing this, I know its not gonna happen. 

So hear me out... 

If you have someone in your life that really cares about you and goes out of there way to make sure that you are doing well, and that you are happy with the situation you are going through, making sure that you always have a shoulder to cry on and someone to talk to, text/call/talk to them ask them how they are doing, show them that you care too. If you don't care about them and want them gone.  Be BLUNT and just let them know that so that they can move on with there lives and move past the bullshit you put them through everyday. 

This is a public service announcement!