Me, Lil Jon & The Eastside Boys

Running

Eyes Closed

Headphones In

Alone

The Music Starts

&

I Am In The Club

Just Me and The Boys

Some People Talking Bad

But my Boys Know What's Up

When You Confront Them,

They Don't Do Nothing.

They Are All Talk And No Show

Now,

Back in The Club,

See a Fine Woman 

She's Dancing Over There,

She's Hot, 

&

 We Have Been Drinking a Little Bit

She Moves From The Window and To The Wall

We Dance Together, 

Feeling The Music

Grindin'

The Club is Too Hot 

Sweat Dripping Down My Trousers

I Open My Eyes 

My Time Is Up 

My Hour Has Passed

Next Time Boys

I Will Be With My Eastside Crew

Next Time!

50 Shades Of Bullshit.

I was going to sit down and write a blog about the turn-over rate of the work force, but as I was flipping through the HBO channels I had another idea.  Why not write about Hollywood and how the mess up our minds emotionally and romantically?

Life doesn't happen like a movie, you don't go through an issue with something that was heart breaking and life changing, then out of the blue someone comes out of no where and changes everything. No no no.  That's not life, that's Hollywood trying to tell you that everything is going to be okay. This isn't true!!! Hollywood doesn't write about your Fiancee of 5 years cheating on you, sends pictures of naked girls, and naked pictures of himself to others, and then try to guilt you in to making it sound like everything is okay. Where is the happy ending to that?! That now I am sitting in an apartment I cannot afford, going to a job that isn't worth my time for what I get paid for, falling asleep by myself for the first time in 5 years! Hollywood doesn't write a story about that, because its too real. It's too real and people will figure out that life isn't any better that what is thrown at you. 

Even in books!!!! 50 Shades of Grey for example. A story of a sadist ass-hole who changes his whole life because for the first time a women says no to him. What is that supposed to put in our minds? Oh I know, that women are able to change men. No!! If you are getting into a relationship to change someone you are in it for all the wrong reasons!! . 

In all honestly, never fall in love with someone. Just love them. Because if you just love them you won't have the same heart break as if you fall in love with them. 

Don't watch Hollywood movies to make your love life better. It will only tell show you things that are going to make you either act like a psycho or a hopeless romantic.. That makes it easy for someone to step on you, and make you feel low. 

You find a guy, and you keep him. Don't try to change him, don't try to control him, just let him know that you are always going to be there for him no matter what! That you are going to be next to that person, when they are upset, going through a difficult situation, or just when they need someone to forget the world with. Not every girl gets that. 

Now, because my fiancee was such a dick to cheat and make me feel so insecure about myself, I cannot look at a guy without first imagining him breaking my heart before it even happens. Now write about that Hollywood!

Life As I Know It The Rap Song

Driving home from work, listening to the radio.  I realized that all rap music is crap now... To illustrate I will write my own rap song, in there style. 

Life As I Know it

Fall off the Mattress, 7am.

Stumble to the bathroom, Charmin.

Getting Ready For Work, Lands' End.

Driving Down the Highway, 60mph.

Talking With Customers, Making That Minimum Wage.

IPhone 4, Messaging the Gang. 

Making Plans, Setting Dates. 

Pikachu Costumes, SuperHero Fates.

Getting Home, Being All Alone.

Dog Park Walks, 50 Shades Of Freedom.

Get That Cardio, Run That Rage.

Fall on To Bed, It's A Cold Place to Be.

Once Again No Sleep For Me. 

Pop that Pill, Ambien

Wake up tomorrow, Do it all again.

Yes, I know this was horrible, but so is all recent rap music. Not making any valid points and saying random words. 

Damn you Drake.

The Lesson Of Instant Karma

I have always been a believer in karma.

 You give good, you receive good.

 You give bad, you receive bad.

When I was in the third grade I began the "fibbing" stage. (Definition Fib: A fib is the innocent version of a lie, usually told by small children whose lies are not large.) Everyone took a part in these, "Yes Mom my homework is finished, yes I cleaned my room." Innocent little lies. Remember the lies you used to say to get out of school? I don't know why when I decided to "fib" I couldn't do it like a normal kid. It always had to be something different and off the wall. I don't know why on this day I couldn't just tell my mom I didn't feel well.  No. I had to say, "Mom, I can't walk." 


I woke up that Friday morning knowing that I did not want to go to school. I just wanted to be home.  I got this wonderful idea that I will just tell my Mother that I couldn't walk.  I was so good at this I crawled out of bed, drug myself to the edge of the stairs and hollered for my Mom.  Told her my legs hurt and that I couldn't bring myself to stand up.  Mom looked at me funny but the manipulation in my face convinced her otherwise and told me it was okay for me to stay home. 


This took place so long ago I do not remember much of what I did that day, but crawl around from the t.v room to the bathroom.  I remember thinking to myself that this was such a boring day and all I wanted to do was get up and walk.  Knowing that I had just lied to my Mother to stay home for the day, I knew that I couldn't do that without getting into trouble.  Pop! A great idea comes into my mind, "I will go out to the garage "to get a soda" I will shut the door behind me and walk around a few times Mom will never know!"


Well, I don't know about your Mom but my Mom is too smart! She noticed that I went into the garage on my hands and knees. She probably thought to herself, "why is my daughter, who can't walk, going to crawl on her hands and knees in a dirty garage to grab a soda when I could have gotten it for her?"  So, she followed me into the garage. Low and behold she finds me walking just fine in the garage. 


Let me just say... I was caught red handed walking in the garage. I don't remember if anything was said at this time but I imagine that I was caught I didn't even try to dig my hole deeper by telling her another "fib". I got my punishment of course and was grounded. 


You think that Karma only goes after adults and older people, but no, Karma treats everyone the same, no matter what age.


Well, this lazy third grader who just wanted a 3-day weekend got her Karma.


Saturday morning rolls around and I crawl out of bed. I have absolutely no feeling in my legs. I fall right to the ground. I crawl out of my room and to the edge of the stairs calling for my Mom trying to tell her that I can't walk. First and foremost can you blame my Mom for not believing me! Not even 24 hours before this she caught me in a white lie saying that I could not walk.  She didn't believe me and tried to get me to stand all day.  I believe she thought that this was my way of getting out of my white lie.  Well, I wasn't lying this time. 


That night the family and I went to Country Buffet. My Mom still didn't believe me to the point where she made me go to Country Buffet leaning on my Dad the entire time.  It wasn't until that I had to use the restroom and crawled on my hands and knees. (Yes it is the most disgusting thing is this planet to have to crawl around on your hands and knees in a Country Buffet restroom.)  I was mortified that I had to do that and she still didn't believe me. 


Once we got home I sat at the top of our stairs crying just asking my mom to believe me that I couldn't walk and this time it was really happening to me. It wasn't until my Mother changed me into my pajamas that she noticed that I had large purple dots all over my legs. 

It was at that time I was taken seriously.

That night I was diagnosed with HSP Henoch-Schonlein purpura. 


(Henoch-Schonlein purpura is caused by an abnormal response of the immune system. It is unclear why this occurs. The syndrome is usually seen in children, but it may affect people of any age. It is more common in boys than in girls. Many people with Henoch-Schonlein purpura had an upper respiratory illness in the weeks before.)


Sadly, my Mom does feel horrible to this day that she didn't believe me and who knows what would have happened if I didn't go to the emergency room that night. 


Honestly, who could blame her for not believing me. 

Instant Karma